Wednesday, April 30, 2014

What's for Lunch?

Is this how far we have come in the US?  Where you need a recipe to make a turkey sandwich??

On the back of the lid of a container of turkey lunch meat, there was a recipe for how to make a “Turkey Sandwich with Swiss”.  

Wow – thanks!

But if I am buying lunch meat in a container, chances are I already know how to make a sandwich, because isn’t that usually what you use lunch meat for?  I’m just saying….
Maybe you should know your customer base a bit better?  Tell us how to make something other than a sandwich or a roll-up.  

Perhaps tell us how to make something out of the lunch meat in the shape of a star filled with cornbread stuffing – not something you do every day or ever , for that matter, but I’m pretty sure people would like it.

Now that we no longer teach Home-Economics in schools, kids don’t know how to cook anything in a stove (cooker) or fix a hole in their sock.    

But I’m pretty sure most people know how to make a sandwich – a couple slices of bread, lunch meat and then whatever you like to accompany it (if anything) – lettuce, mayo, mustard, avocado, cheese – cut it in half and you’re good to go.  

Not sure who exactly doesn’t get this – even a five year old knows what’s in his sandwich.  Or am I wrong?  Did you read this and say –oh thank goodness, finally I have the recipe.   NOW I know how to make a Turkey Sandwich with Swiss – that was the one thing on my repertoire I was missing!!

In that case – here you go, life is now complete.  Enjoy your new skill!  Oh and you should fire your mother – honestly…

Friday, April 25, 2014

Wash Your Mouth Out With Soap??

Now, the choice is yours – what would you rather wash your mouth out with and why is it even a choice?

While at a bar my husband frequents with his work friends, I came across this very interesting set up.  Or should I say conundrum?  Because obviously they felt the need to label the dispensers.

So, the pump by the sink is handsoap you say?  Wow, never would have thought of that – soap- by the sink.  Genius!

And the pump on the wall with the cups hanging out of it is mouthwash?  Ok, got it.  

Now when should this pretty simple set up be a problem?  Possibly when it’s in a bar and people are taking mouthfuls of soap or handfuls of bright green mint mouthwash?  

And when would that occur – ohhh, when the patron has had too much to drink!  

Actually what this could be is a very simple and very smart ploy.

As soon as someone comes back from the bathroom and tells you (the server) that they just shot a cupful of soap into their mouth or squirted bright green minty water all over their hands and I assume clothes due to its viscosity (probably can smell that error) that it is time to cut the patron off.  

And if by chance they can still read and see that the dispensers are clearly marked, than they must still be ok to have another one?  

Could be brilliant.

Or, it could be time to remove the mouthwash dispenser – it’s pretty disgusting and could use some of that soap it gets confused with, apparently – all too often.

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Naming Convention

Pulling into the dentist I get out of my car and quickly glance at the vehicle parked next to me – then I do a double take, laugh and decide I need to take a photo of this on the way out – if it’s still here. 

Just curious, do you see it too or am I the only one that finds the “name” of this very expensive vehicle hilarious?

Now, if you just see SPORT HSE, I want you to expand your mind.  Let’s say there is an apostrophe in the word SPORT, so it reads S’PORT.  Ok good.

Now let’s play that through.

What I saw when I looked at this – again very expensive vehicle- was SUPPORT HOSE and thought, gee that’s a funny name for a car.

Did no one at this “upper class” company see this?  Did no one associate all the funny phonetic spellings that are going on in this text and twitter world with the name of this truck?  I saw it instantly and laughed.  

No one, no one who gets paid large sums of money to do this for a living caught this on a glance and said, Hey – this might not fly, if you look at it quickly it looks like it says Support Hose??  Clearly not a good name for a high end vehicle.

To which maybe they received this reply “Well, cars really don't have names today – they are all numbers and letters in a jumble that no one can remember, surely it won’t be a problem.  Besides – who wears support hose these days; don’t women just go bare legged?”

Ah yes, so there you have it – maybe the next version will be aimed at men and called JCK STRP.  

Range Rover, if you need a new employee, just let me know, I’m full of great ideas – GRN COMBI, we could paint that one green or yellow, the new LR2 could become ALRT, we could go with reds and oranges, or BB QUE, complete with flames – oh what fun we could have!

Monday, April 21, 2014

My computer died

Sorry guys no post today, my computer shut down on its own Saturday and that seems to be that. Hopefully I'll have things in order by weds- that or I'll be hand typing in a post through my iPhone. Boo...
Update- I took my computer to the "Geek Squad" for resuscitation and true to their field, she has come back to life.

And might I give kudos to the guy who waited on me, we talked band stuff while he was working the girl over and he repeatedly thanked me for being nice (apparently and as expected, working in a Customer Service position, solely there to fix things that are broken, doesn't find you dealing with happy people) and when all was said and done - he charged me nothing.  Husband thinks it was because I wore a low cut t-shirt.

Whatever -thanks Geek Squad Guy - you rule!!  

Friday, April 18, 2014

Gnome Fell Down (Repost)

Hi all, It's Easter weekend and the house is bustling.  So I'm sending out a re-post from a previous April.  I've got cookies to bake and decorate, Sunday dinner groceries to buy, paper to be shredded by the pound (while it is being hosted for free), figure out something to cook for the pot luck tonight, etc, etc. 

It will be nice to have the Bunny visit over and no more holidays until the beginning of summer at the end of May (oh Summer - where art thou???)

Therefore - enjoy - this was originally posted April 23, 2013.  And yes - the Gnomes are all better now - complete with a new rope and a fresh coat of colorful paint, courtesy of one of my nieces. Have a pleasant Easter!

And broke his crown…

Well not really, but he did fall down and what’s funny is he is indeed holding his head.  I couldn’t pass this up as it is a literal thing.  

I do love my Gnomes and most certainly don’t want them hurt – as of course I am sure none of you would want any of your Gnomes hurt.

What? You don’t have Gnomes?  Really?  I thought everyone had Gnomes.  You’re joking right – you have Gnomes.

Come on, they are fun joyous little creatures that protect your yard and garden – and well, there might be some in your house too.  Of course I am only basing this on our house, where there are many of the little fellas (and a few gals) around. 

Anyway, there have been three little guys swinging on a rope on our front porch for – oh I don’t know – ten years?  We never brought them in during the winter, they just stayed outside and played in the wind – swinging away in any small or gale forced “breezes” we have had over the years.  Apparently the winds we had two days ago were too much and down a couple of the boys went.

And well, it looks like one hurt his head.  I assume the other one is cold.

As for Gnome #3, he’s still hanging on for dear life.  Noting what has happened below him, he is not going to let the same thing happen to him.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

How's About A Little Snow on the Barbie?

I know shrimp might be a little more appetizing, or a steak even – which is what I grilled up just this weekend.  We had beautiful weather Sunday, it was 77 degrees (25 Celsius) and yes, the steak was fabulous.

But Mother Nature has a different plan and well, we have done it – we have beaten the record snowfall, set in the winter of 1880, yes 1880!

Not that Easter is just a few short days away, or that we are in April or anything – that means nothing to us Michiganders.  Snow in April is an unfortunate norm. 

Now the record snowfall might not be that much in other areas, I am quite sure that 100 inches is nothing just a hundred miles north of Detroit – but for us, it’s a 130 year old record.  

And by now, we’ve had it.  Done, we are done with this fluffy, pretty white stuff – enough already!

So, since I have a few extra inches of snow on the BBQ, I’d be happy to fire it up and offer you a nice cool drink of water.  Anything I can do to get rid of the stuff AND have a get together sounds like a great plan to me!

So if you would like to join me in the snow elimination, snow boil – fire up your BBQ and let’s get a melting.  ASAP!!   

We can make it a community event – let’s just not make it an annual ok?  I’d hate to wish for a do over of this past season – I just wish it over….