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Sunday, June 30, 2013

Hue-Mugg-Idy



Whew, is it ever Humuggity outside!!

My hair is like a brillo pad, only softer and brown – ok, brillos go brown if you let them rust and my hair has red tinges – but that’s about as close as I’m going to go with that analogy…

Humuggity you say?  Well that is a word I made up last night.  It wasn’t on purpose, I was trying to say either Humidity or Muggy and Humuggity came out.  

I like it – I think it’s a good word, fits the purpose exactly.

When you say the above phrase (with emphasis) – “Whew, is it ever humuggity outside” – there is no question that you mean humid or muggy.   

C’mon, try it – out loud.  See – it just works.

People make up new words all the time, like – uhh I can’t believe I’m going to repeat these – but like Branjolina, Tomkat, Bennifer – guh, enough of those, but you know what I’m saying – new combo words are made every day.

Are you listening Webster’s?  You put Doh! In the dictionary from Homer Simpson and he’s not even a real person – 

I just might start a campaign, what do you think – should we try and get Humuggity in the dictionary? 

Yeah?  Great! I’ll let you know what I come up with to start the movement.  It could very well be my mark in the world.

Humuggity – Noun;   Pronunciation - Hue-mugg-idy;   Humugged – singular;   Meaning: thick outside with dampness, hot and clammy.  The quick fall of the Barometer in hot weather constitutes the certainty of a day with high humuggity.

Those of us who live in muggy states will certainly welcome the word – can you hear me Florida?  I’m talking to you – it should really be your state nick name.  We here in Michigan only have Hummugityness in the summer months, any other time we are freezing our tuchus’ off.   But you Florida – it’s Humugged for you all the time – you know what I’m talking about!           

Friday, June 28, 2013

Earning a Crust



My I tell you, you can’t beat the help around here…..

You are witnessing a true to life expert on greenery, right there, busting his tail in our back yard.
We imported him from Ireland, you see it’s very green over there and well, we have a large yard that is also very green – so we had an expert fly in for some assistance.

And there he is – something like 4000 miles from home, pushing a mower in our “garden”!  

I know – our luck around this house is amazing – Italian snow angels in the winter and Irish greens keepers in the summer.  Can’t say I’ve ever lived anywhere else that produces such fabulous free perks as this place! 

All this for a few weeks room and board, fabulous I tell you, just fabulous!

Oh and the same thing goes as with our snow angel (posted 3/17/13) – you’re going have to get your own – this magical corner of the earth is our special secret.  Sorry….

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Vile Yellow Liquid (Re-post)

Hello all - happy hot summer re-post Wednesday to ya!!  We're sweltering here in the Motor City and well, we are truly enjoying ourselves!  See you Friday with a whole new post... 




If you have no goals in life - Might I suggest one? 

Today our family was pepper sprayed. 

Actually only one of us was, the dog – but it quickly became a family affair.  

Our dog, like the millions of other dogs in this world, does not like the mail carrier.  Her sweet, calm, loving, gentle self turns into a growling 45lb mass, with hair that stands up on her back when she sees the mailman.  Lately this has not really been an issue; we moved the mailbox to the end of the driveway so the mail carrier no longer needs to come up on the porch, thus the dog no longer hits the window snarling because the mailman isn’t close to the house. 

Ah, but today, today is Saturday and she was outside hanging in the yard, having a sniff of stuff here, a sniff of stuff over there and suddenly a sniff of the mailman walking up to the mail box…… 

I hear the growl, I fly and I do mean fly, out of the house, but I am too late – she is already covered in yellow stuff and the mail carrier is screaming “Is this your dog???!!!” 

I grab her collar, drag her up the drive, holler at the hubby she’s been pepper sprayed and head back out to the mail carrier who is out of breath and none too happy.  She hands me the mail and tells me “Dogs don’t usually charge me” (she's got three bad legs and a terrible limp, "charge" is a bit dramatic, but she does have a fierce growl).  I apologize and head in – completely unaware of the fun about to befall us. 

Hubby is wiping her face off with a cloth and trying to calm the doggie down.  I grab her from the underside, pick her up and head for the tub, but I’m gagging before I get there and drop her unceremoniously into the tub – she slips (it’s sad, she’s old), hubby and I start gagging profusely.  

I’m having a hard time finding the faucet and then getting a temperature that’s good for the water; my husband is sick hanging over the toilet.  Finally we start to rinse her, she shakes – all hell breaks loose……  

Once she shakes, the pepper stuff gets in our eyes, we can’t see, I can’t function, I can’t find the sink to wash my face, I can’t even stand up, I want the eye cup, a wash cloth, the shower head, anything.  Snot is hanging from my face.  Hubby is gagging, I don’t know what he is going through, but he still has a hold of her in the tub, I am useless fumbling for something to hold water to dump on my face. 

A few minutes pass, water has been flung multiple times into my eyes, they now open, we find the shampoo and start washing the very unhappy dog – hubby is now off on his can’t function flop somewhere in the too small bathroom.  Every so often I just turn the sprayer to my eyes; the bathroom is a hazmat water wonderland disaster area. 

My nose is a giant tomato, my red faced hacking husband returns, we finish up, remove everything cloth that came into contact with her, collar the dog with a different collar, change clothes, I hit the washing machine, he takes her outside to shake.   

My arms are on fire, the hanging snot doesn’t stop flowing for at least twenty minutes (if I were an eight year old boy that would have been really cool) hubby hasn’t been able to get a full breath for at least as long, his hands are swollen.   

Dog, well dog is just standing there, cold, wet, red eyed, stunned, shaking and sadly fourteen years old – no idea what just happened, why it happened and why she still can’t open her eyes – I pick her back up and we go for round two in the tub….  

This house now has a family goal – we aspire to never, ever, come in contact with pepper spray again.  Ever!     

Might I suggest this as a very wise goal for you and your family too??

Monday, June 24, 2013

Let 'er Rip




Hey, have you all seen this yet?

This is one of those fabulous things like drink holders in shopping carts and water bottle fillers in drinking fountains – hmmm, both have something to do with liquids.  Well, this one does not, although maybe it could, it just depends on the seal and would it be watertight.

Anyway, back to have you seen this?  Guess I should tell you what it is, in case you haven’t seen this.

It’s Velcro – built into a plastic bag!!  

I know – flippin ingenious.  

Now re-sealable really means re-sealable, no more “skill tests” with sticky strips and zip-locks… 

Life just got a whole lot simpler.

I had thought the zip lock on plastic bags similar to this (i.e. dog food, frozen veges, lunch meat, cheese) was a pretty good idea.  They didn’t always work, but the zip lock was better than the chip clip, paper clip or rubber band options.

But this is so much cooler!  The pictures are from our dog’s food bag.  You just pull it open and then pretty much touch it shut again.  No lining up zippy locks and pulling and pulling across the bag trying to make them fit together properly enough to close.  On this bag I have a whole half inch of Velcro hooks, it’s always going to line up.  Half inch vs. three millimeters – now let me see, which one is easier??  

And unlike a slippy, misaligned or torn off zip locks, there is NO WAY THIS WON’T WORK….ok, I’m sure someone will find a way, but it’s not me (at least not yet anyway).  It’s pretty much a one touch deal, since it’s not holding liquid – water tightness is not an issue – so for the most part – the seal is always lined up well enough to close the bag.  

Plus, I’m removing things from the bag – therefore it’s not going to be too full to shut – every time I use it, there is more room – so it’s always going to work!

I know!  I think it’s great too.  Oh you can tell? 

It’s the little things people – the little things….