Monday, November 11, 2013

Early Thanksgiving Feast?

What is that?    What Is That?     WHAT - IS - THAT????

Oh you think I would have learned by now.  

Don’t ask a question for something you really don’t want an answer.

Bleh, Blech, Blechy.

THAT – was a bird.  Yup, it was, about three minutes before I asked the question – it was indeed a real live bird.

By the time the question was answered, it was a pile of feathers and a skull.

Rosie, you all know Rosie by now (i.e. Trouble)?  The dog is looking at me as I write this, in a rather adorable stare.  I can’t do anything but shake my head.  I’m not sure I’m cut out for Dachshund ownership.  

I was on my way out of the house to grab a rake and a trash bucket to finish raking the front lawn, when she flew to the door and wanted to go outside with me.  I think I may have had a premonition because I vividly recall saying – Oh, I don’t think you should go out right now, I don’t have time to watch you, I have to beat the sunset.  

Then I looked at her and said, ok, you can go out while I get the rake and my gloves, then you have to go inside.

I swear, in the amount of time it took for the garage to open, me to get a rake off the wall, my gloves out of a bucket and come around the corner – this happened.

How?  How I ask?  It was three minutes - tops.

I go pick her feather filled face out of the pile, walk to the back door with her and call for the husband.  He comes out, has a look at the residue and tells her Good Girl.  Good Girl??   

Bleh, Blech, Blechy.

After I rake the front, I go to collect the bird remnants.   As I am doing this, a menagerie of squirrels and birds gather at the fence to watch.  I tell them, don’t blame me, I’m just the clean-up girl (and it is disgusting).

Then a squirrel starts moaning a low dirge at me, I’ve never heard this tune before – I guess they are still mourning the loss of their brethren squirrel from a couple months ago – also lost to the mouth of Miss Rosie.

Bleh, Blech, Blechy.

Interesting facts regarding this incident:

1)  When I raked up the feathers and fluff, I found no feet – she must have thought they were like little rawhide chews?
2)  Apparently when you conquer a pigeon in the yard, it is impossible to keep control of your bladder for the rest of the day.  She was so excited, she wet her dog bed – both of them.
3)  It is possible to regurgitate pigeon parts a full 24 hours after the initial feast – four times.
4)  The rinse-and-vac is worth its weight in gold (ok, we knew this already – it was just reconfirmed).