Friday, March 1, 2013

"Exploding" Metal Cylinder

Oh my goodness – mom, I'm glad you're home, it was crazy – the trash – it just EXPLODED – all over the kitchen!
Me?  Did I do it?  Do you think I did this?  Isn’t this the look of innocence?  No, you say it’s the look of guilt?  But why, why would you think that?  Oh my ears, they are pressed down to me head like I did something wrong.  Hmm, you say I look scared?  Umm, is dad behind you?  He is – ohhh.

Well tell him how brave I was.  Mom – the trash can – it just exploded – then it miraculously fell over. 

Well, when that happened I scurried about all the detritus.  I looked at EVERY SINGLE piece.  I did!  Some of them smelled so good – well, I ate them.  So really mom, I was cleaning up the mess.  You know the mess from the incredible explosion.

You know I’m almost 15 right?  And my legs aren’t so good?  Then really – how else could this have happened? Surely you don’t think I’m capable of taking down this big tall metal trash can?   I tell you, I heard a big bang – then I scurried out to the kitchen to investigate and you know – get the baddy if there was a baddy to be found.  But there was no baddy and what I found was simply wonderful!!

Oh, you don’t think this is wonderful?  I’m sorry I didn’t save you any of the good bits I ate.  Would you have liked some?  I should have thought of that.  

Ohhh, I got it – I’m sure the tin foil will come out in one piece tomorrow in the yard – when you are picking up my little lawn logs, you could save that one and bring it back in?  It will be easy to find – it should sparkle in the sun!  Like you mom, sparkly – like the sun!

Um, hi dad, I was just telling mom…… uh, no I don’t know who is going to pick all this up - you perhaps?  Ah, yes, well – I was telling mom – it just exploded – it was great!!  Ahem, I mean terrible, yes this is terrible.  
Oh the mess – I know – none of what’s left I could eat – it is terrible.  Really dad, there would have been no mess at all – if you know – it all had been edible.

You don’t think there was an explosion – no? Oh, you think it was me too?  Oh.

Well than aren’t you proud?  Look I fought a battle with something bigger than myself and won – don’t you feel safer now?  Just think what I would have done to a baddy – and he would have been edible – I promise dad, when the baddy breaks in – I won’t leave any mess.  No – I’ll be sure to clean it all up.   

Go lay down?  Yeah ok – I can do that….
Is that the vacuum, no not the vacuum – WWHHHIRRRRR!!!!!