Friday, December 13, 2013

Guess What Happened Here?

Ok, I have a game for today – it’s called “Guess what happened here”?

You start- 

The ceiling leaked from all the snow and the chair was right under it?  
No – that’s not it.

We shot and intruder using the chair to crawl out the window?
No – that’s not it.

We served a guest too much Christmas Eggnog and they were too drunk to hold it?
No – that’s not it.

A glass of water was balanced on the arm rest, which is not a table, and it fell onto the chair?
No – that’s not it.

Someone tripped while carrying their coffee and threw it all over the chair?
No – that’s not it.

A family member with a hell of a cold sneezed the biggest sneeze know to man?
No – that’s not it.

Oh come now – hasn’t anyone thought of young Miss Rosie?  You know the “precious” little heart that sleeps on the back of this chair all day long?  ‘Tis the reason for the green blanket on the back cushion – makes it easy to wash.  

You know what isn’t easy to wash – a fricken chair – that’s what isn’t easy to wash!

Oh yes – and the correct the answer is piss, lovely warm dog piss… really no other way to put it.  

Yeah, ALL THAT from a tiny little Dachshund – amazing, I know – and not in a good way.

We were baking cookies, singing Christmas tunes, dancing around the house having a merry ol’ time and then the merriment ended abruptly.   

 It’s not like we weren’t home and she couldn’t get outside – the kitchen is open to the living room, I was staring her direction every time I turned from the stove. 

Have I mentioned we were home?  I did, yeah, well we were – home.

My father always told me a dog will never piddle where they sleep – apparently my father was mistaken.  Rosie must be the exception to the rule, because I have posted earlier about the time she peed in both her dog beds when she was so excited about offing a pigeon (“Early Thanksgiving Feast” posted 11/11/13). 

Our other dog is such a good dog, nary a bit of trouble in over a decade (ok, ok, she steals loafs of bread off the counter – everyone has a crux).

I don’t know – such a precious little face and a troubled little sprite – what are we to do with her?  What are we to do….