Failure to Launch - Yet Again

So exactly 42 days ago I bought a new computer.  Eight days into those 42 days, it died.

I spent two plus hours on the phone (i.e hold) with a guy who wanted to send me a new one - I insisted it had to be something small (how could it be dead after only 8 days?), so after the first hour and a half, I pulled out my husbands computer and "chatted" with another D*ll "employee"

After 45 minutes, he had it working, I hung up with the the other guy, stupidly refusing the new one.

This thing has been touchy from the start. (I believe I blogged about this in September).

At 36 days, it died again.  I chatted with another employee, who helped me get it working again.  s l o w, s l o w, s l o w........

Today - day 42, my D*ll is dead again - but not before it rebooted like seventeen times in a row - then the power went off - thus equaling dead. 

I would like that new computer that was promised to me now.  They say after 30 days it isn't possible to send me one.  You all know they are lying, anything is possible.  I talked to managers and supervisors - both hemming and hawing.

Now they are going to send me a box to put my piece of shit brand new D*ll computer in to send back to them.  They asked me to back it up first - hahahaha.  What part of dead and this thing is a lemon do you not understand?  I'll back it up all right - right under my car tire while going in reverse.

Then the fella asks me for my address, I abbreviated MI for Michigan - which he promptly asked me if that was the state of Miami.  Yes, I live in the imaginary state of Miami - that is correct.

So I will be without a computer again, while I wait for a box, mail it in, have them "fix" it, and return it to me.  Then when I get it back - I will wipe it clean and sell it at a huge discount (i.e. massive loss) to whoever wants to take the chance with it and buy.  At that point I will head to the store and by an HP or a Mac. 

Expensive lesson learned, never liked my work D*lls, what made me think anything had improved??

Thank you for listening, I'll go put the sledgehammer back in the garage now - this was venting enough. 
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**Not my computer pictured above, "ctcomputers.us" provided the picture I borrowed.  I like the bullet hole effect, not sure I'd set it on my bed afterwards though** 

***Update 1/9/15 - Oh my look - according to Adidas there IS a State of Miami :)

http://miami.racked.com/archives/2015/01/08/university-of-miami-adidas.php