Living Someone Else's List

 

You know how people have buckets lists and things they want to do before they die?  Yeah – well I accomplished something on someone else’s bucket list yesterday….

I completed a Half Marathon.

Wow – cool – wonderful – good for me!  

Except I never had any urge to do one before.  My friend talked me into it, said it’ll be fun, we can train together – blah, blah, blah – so on the last possible day to register, she finally talked me into it and I signed up, opened my wallet and started “training” in August.

Then, then she came out only once with me to “train”.  That’s ok, she had stuff going on, but I knew this already and how I was talked into a 13.1 mile race will forever boggle me – I’m a very strong willed person – 5k, sure any day – 21.1k or 13.1 miles – no F-ing way.

So, yesterday/Sunday at 5:30 am (yes AM) I was standing on a Detroit street in 34 degree (1 Celsius) ultimate bone shivering breath seeing weather, waiting for our 7:00 am start, nowhere near wearing enough clothes.  Husband dropped me at a nearby curb (streets were already closed) wished me luck and went back home to bed. 

I huddled with the masses quivering and dancing to the music, then as the delayed starts started (I was way in the back – aka with the slow qualifiers), I picked the street for an earlier qualifiers tossed clothing, found a new looking windbreaker and put it on.   

Yes, I picked the street pile of runners tossed clothing, yes – it was 34 degrees and I was wearing a long sleeve tech shirt with bright orange one over top – numb doesn’t even begin to explain my temperature.  And I will also confess after the race started I also shopped a “new” pair of gloves off the street to put on over mine, because my hands had no feeling.

Bang, the race starts and 27,000 of us set off for the border in 2 minutes cycles.  Quite a lovely “perk” as we were crossing the Ambassador Bridge into Windsor, Ontario, Canada was the sun rising over the water.  Being a non-competitive “runner” I stopped and took a few photos.   And on the way back to the US we ran through the tunnel, which was pleasantly not freezing at all.

Now, I did ok, I didn’t get crampy until mile 11, which after that point I moved very, very slow – but not as slow as others and I was never incapacitated.  And I finished respectably, the only time I could have shaved off is when I changed my insoles at mile nine and couldn’t get my damn soaking wet shoes back on my soaking wet feet.  I favor barefoot shoes and just put in a tad of “cush” when my feet started aching.  It was a wise move as my feet may be the only part of my body today that does not hurt.  The rest of me can barely function.

So there you have it – if completing a Half Marathon is on your bucket list and you never get to it, you can use my half marathon in its place.  You are welcome and no, there will not be any other half marathons in my life.  One is more than I ever planned on.

This is a stick-up!

Haha, you can’t stick me up – you’re a mannequin!  Haha, Ha, ha…. Can you?

Just a guess, but this store doesn’t employ professional window dressers do they?   Can I have another guess? 

Great – by chance do they employ ex-cons?  You know, on a work relief program – help someone get a foot back in society and get a tax break from the government for employing former criminals.

And might this current employee have a history with hold-ups?   

Why else would someone pull a purple nylon over a mannequins head?  Because it seems more stylish than just a plain beige one?  After all, you are now working in the fashion industry … (note all those natty wool caps in the back ground).

Maybe I should have popped a cap on the mannies head – then he would have looked more like a performer from the blue man group and less like a cat burglar.  No?

Ah, what will they think of next to scare you out of the store, put a water pistol in their composite hand?

Dollar, Dollar - Who's Got A Dollar?

They say honesty is the best policy – I’d say that is probably true.

Can you read his sign?  It doesn’t say he’s hungry (although he could be), it doesn’t say he has to take care of a family (although he might need too), it doesn’t say he needs a coat (although he will very soon) – it says he needs a dollar for a beer. Yep - beer.

And you know, this request probably gets him more attention and many more dollars than just standing there with the standard cardboard sign asking for a little help.  

It also makes you laugh and probably while you are getting that chuckle, you flash the man a smile.   

How many smiles do you think he gets a day with any of the other standard fare signs?  My guess is very few, most people avoid eye contact at all – let alone give a quick smile.

So yeah – why lie?  The man would like a beer and perhaps a friendly smile – and really, is there anything wrong with that?

Merry Christmas!! (in September)

Wait - what, it’s not Christmas? No?

It’s September.  I agree – it is September. 

Not October, November or December – you know December, when Christmas actually is….

Hmmm, we still have two more major holidays – decorating holidays to go, Halloween, which is the very LAST day of NEXT month (October) and Thanksgiving, which is the third week of the month AFTER that (November).

But not at this store, nope at this store it is apparently Christmas time – in giant twenty foot fashion.  

This does not make me happy on a warm 75 degree day (24 Celsius for my European friends).   

I don’t understand why we rush things so – the leaves are still on the trees, there is no hint of snow (of course this is Michigan – that could change in an instant).  The time hasn’t changed yet and it is barely Fall, by means of the Equinox.  

Yet here is a jolly nut cracker or tin soldier or sentry or something Christmasy-esque standing guard at the door of a big box hardware store.  One that I will be visiting again today, painting the living room and hall ways (made a pretty but poor color choice – therefore I will be painting them again tonight, funny how daylight changes things).

So Merry Christmas – three months early!! Care to come celebrate with me tonight and lift a paint roller in festive cheer?  

I'll be back Monday Sept 29th

Sorry for the absence - see you on Monday (promise).

You Are What You Eat

Yummy, yummy in my tummy.

But what the hell did I put in my tummy?  And what does that make me if I ate it?

The other day I was at the grocery store and I was hungry (well, pretty much in general I’m always hungry) and they say if you shop while you are hungry than you buy stuff that is not on your list (again, pretty common for me).

I grab these totally yummy looking baby danishes and inhale two as soon as I get in the car (did I mention I was hungry)?

Then, then I looked at the label that I just tore open to get in to the container and there are two hundred ingredients on there.  I’m serious – TWO HUNDRED – there are about seven items on a line and thirty one (and a half) lines of ingredients. 

It’s a danish for goodness sake.  Butter, flour, sugar salt, eggs, vanilla, baking soda, some fruit topping and powdered sugar and water for icing.  That’s ten – ten things – not 200!!!

So we ate – ate 190 extra ingredients – oh my.  

Funny thing is that I am usually pretty conscious about what we eat and what I feed my family.  I’m an anti-GMO freak, so I check everything (corn or soy - almost never) and how something with a six inch ingredient label on the FRONT of the box got by me is stupefying.

You see normally we buy our danishes and bread etc. at a local bakery.  We are spoiled for choice here in Detroit from multiple bakeries that have been around 80 plus years.  Fresh daily, no transport, no ingredients we can’t pronounce to sustain fake freshness.  Just baked new – every single day.  

  

So we’re not dead –we didn’t gain ten strange puffy pounds around the waist and they were quite tasty, but 200 ingredients for a baby danish?  Wow, what a bad choice and how come this is ok?  This should so not be ok….